The question says it all I guess. What was it like fulfilling your fantasy that you were in two mind about?
I’m a gay trans man. I have a vagina, and I mostly do vaginal sex.
My relationships have been gay relationships, because we were both men and I am unambiguously read as male in public.
But I also do frequently have casual sex. There are a lot of gay men who do find relationships with trans men specifically to be erotic. There are bisexual men who don’t really care what they are topping. There are straight men who just want to fuck a vagina. There are insecure DL men who feel that a trans man is a safe outing.
Being attracted to a trans women as a straight guy is normal. You are expressing attraction to a woman. I’ve known trans women in relationships with 100% straight guys.
The larger reality here is that labels are shorthands, not laws. As a cis straight man, you have been told all of your life that anything outside of being attracted to a certain type of cis women is expected of you, that any non conformance with that script is “gay” and stigmatized.
You can have a sexual encounter or relationship with a trans woman and consider yourself 100% heterosexual if that’s important to you, because you are a man having sex with a woman. Hell - you can even experiment with a cis dude and consider yourself straight - there are piles and piles of dudes flipping through all kinds of apps right now just trying to get their dick sucked by any willing warm mouth.
Sexuality is spectrum and it changes across your life. You don’t have to feel worried about that, there’s nothing wrong with you.
I’m going to repeat the warning against fetishizing people only here, because the previous warning about that was better than I could say.
But I’ve dated trans women. Had sex with them too.
It wasn’t some kind of fantasy or fetish for me, I just don’t see trans women as anything other than women. I have my preferences, but it’s really more about the connection than anatomy anyway. If I ever had a connection with a man, I’d at least try it out.
Just putting it out there, since you’re asking about sexual stuff rather than romance, there are differences in anatomy between cis and trans women, but there’s differences in anatomy between different cis women, and different trans women. Things feel different when you’re fucking, yeah. But not better or worse. It’s like the differences between getting your dick sucked, fucking a cis vagina, and fucking a cis woman in the ass. You’ll like what you like, and better is subjective.
Trans women aren’t some kind of magic fuck that’s going to change your life. Nobody is a magic fuck like that. So don’t expect your fantasy to compare to reality. You’ve got your head wrapped up in what you think trans women are, and they’re just women. No real woman can match imagination like that, trans or cis.
Also, be fucking respectful. A lot of trans women have issues with their bodies because that’s part of being trans. If you find someone to play fantasy fuckball with you, you treat them like gold. You don’t go around treating their body like a fucking private tour of transness. You make out, you fuck, and don’t be a fucking asshole.
If someone is willing to get sexual with you, and it turns out that the fantasy doesn’t work, that you have some kind of turn off, you be a decent human being. You should do that with anyone agreeing to fuck you, but since whoever it is will be doing you a favor by opening themselves up to being your fetish, you go the extra mile to make sure you respect that.
We all like what we like, and if you don’t like it you shouldn’t fake it, but you can be a gentleman about it. If you can’t, then stay the fuck home and jerk off.
Thanks for the comment and your opinion, I am new here and didn’t see or get a warning. I would like to read it if you wouldn’t mind pointing me in that direction. I am a bit confused by the tone of your response as it’s both informative yet seemingly judgemental? That being said, interpreting intention in a text message can be difficult at times… for me at least. Some personalities just come across differently in text.
I have gone back to read my post again, and I don’t feel like I’ve crossed any boundaries, insulted or fetishised anyone. I shared something going on inside of me and wondered if others had similar experiences.
I am not sure what to make of your advice either, i don’t appreciate the tone of that part for sure. Lecturing a stranger on their level of respect is quite bold to say the least.
I would like to ask, what about my post caused your reaction? I feel like you read something that was not there, BUT I am open to the possibility that I wrote something that I was unaware of. ( between the lines if you must) care to engage?
What you fantasise about doesn’t define your sexuality
I’ve fulfilled many fantasies, others will remain (for one reason or another) in the realm of fantasy
Every single time it has lived up to expectations, but that’s probably because I am of an age where I didn’t have my first introduction to sex through unrealistic porn
Remember that once something is done, it can’t be undone, and keep yourself safe. Physically and emotionally.
Other than that, go forth and enjoy!
Life’s short
